“Follow your bliss. The heroic life is living the individual adventure. There is no security in following the call to adventure. Nothing is exciting if you know what the outcome is going to be.” ~ Joseph Campbell
Because of the intense nature of working at the VA, staff at the medical clinic would begin to look at life after the VA as we neared the time of retirement.
I was just 3 years 'shy' of when I was eligible to retire based on time in service and my age when I started thinking about what I'd do next. I was going to work at Bloomingdale's or some other high end retail store which would be quite a contrast from the gray interior with fluorescent lights of the VA Outpatient Clinic. I fancied myself as getting dressed up and enjoying helping shoppers choose accessories to complement their outfits. It was the exact opposite of my career as a social worker where we provided emotional and financial support to those who served. We addressed the biopsychosocial needs of veterans and their families whose suffering was palpable. I fancied a part-time job with ease and meeting friends for lunch at lovely restaurants.
File those plans under what was I thinking???
In December of 2006 as I was planning the rest of my life, my mind, body and soul were crying out for healing. The Universe clearly had other plans. I was diagnosed with Post-Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease. I was told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair and quit my job if there was any hope of stabilizing the debilitating symptoms where they were. The limp from polio returned, I had difficulty swallowing, breathing, walking and felt depressed and anxious. The initial rehab specialists were tremendously helpful in providing relief with a cane, leg brace, wrist splints, a wheelchair, speech and swallow interventions and energy conservation techniques.
I was blessed to meet a physical therapist, Allison Lamarre-Poole at Spaulding Rehab in Downtown Boston which was near the VA. Dr. ElAbd, a pain management specialist referred me to her after my 2nd cervical spine injection. She did not subscribe to the "use it and you'll lose it" theory for polio survivors and held enough faith for both of us that I was not destined to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair.
In February of 2007, after a month of sessions with Allison, I got still and asked for Divine Guidance about my future. On a dark, cold February evening, the poem, "Running the Race" poured out of me as if a spigot was turned on in my soul. When Tom came home from an outing with our 20 year old twins, I told him there is life after the VA! I did not know the how's or any of the details but knew poetry and writing were going to be involved.
I smile now as I came up with the idea of "New World Greeting Cards" original poetry for every occasion and started writing a poetry book. I continued to provide the best care I could to my veterans and their families given my own physical limitations while planning my exit from the VA. I took time for self care and went for 3X/week physical therapy sessions with my earth angel Allison.
Allison set me on my healing path mind, body and soul and soon I realized I had a Date with Destiny.
From Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life:
A Date With Destiny
Don’t wait til you die to let your soul fly free
please listen and hear what happened to me.
My body was broken every imaginable place
yet to the world always a smile on my face.
My soul trapped inside feeling it was broken too
God brought me out of darkness my light I shine on you.
She showed me the way through people I met
it took awhile a message hard to get.
The kingdom of heaven is right inside me
take the leap of faith fulfill destiny.
While I did my soul work and let my soul fly free
my body transformed changes did I see.
My head now aligned the tremor no more
my body aligned such strength in my core.
When once head detached from my heart and my soul
they all work together amazingly whole.
The rules that I live by are my rules alone
I found strength and courage the past now has flown.
I gave 6 weeks notice and on May 25th, 2007, left behind my award winning career as a VA social worker to heal my life. At the time I didn't understand the totality of what that meant or how it would manifest in my life.
This past year we were all challenged to shift from the plans we made to embrace a date with destiny. Having opportunities to be an in person motivational speaker were put on hold but I participated in Zoom events and had my story shared on different outlets.
I wrote my book, "Hope is a Garden: Poems and Essays From the 2020 Pandemic" and have been deeply moved by the reception it has received.
There often comes a time in life when we have to let go of the life we have planned so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.
Be sure to tune into Dreamvisions 7 Radio to hear my conversation with Bernie Siegel, MD on his show Mind Health Matters, tomorrow and Friday, and May 27th and 28th at 12:00am and 12:00pm ET. We talk about my newest book, my journey as a survivor of paralytic polio and trauma, healing, hope and possibilities and how my relationship with Bernie helped me on my journey of transformation since the 1980's.
From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary
For more information about my journey from childhood polio and trauma to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond, visit my website.
"Hope is a Garden:Poems and Essays From the 2020 Pandemic" along with all of my books to inspire and uplift you is available on Amazon.
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