From "Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life" available on Amazon
It was a cold, dark day in February 2007. I sat in a leg brace, using a wheelchair at times for mobility. I faced a grim and uncertain future as the doctors handed down the decree of the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease. They told me that if I had any hope of stabilizing the disease where it was, I would have to quit my full time award-winning career as a VA social worker three years shy of when I was eligible for retirement. It was a no-brainer. I knew I had to take a leap of faith and leave my career. But what’s a social worker to do after almost 25 years? She opens her heart to the cadence of Dr. Seuss that brought her so much comfort during the painful physical therapy sessions as she recovered from paralytic polio. This is the first poem I penned. Bear in mind, I had never run a day in my life.
Running the Race
Early summer 1959 my kindergarten year
everyone around me filled with nervous fear.
Despite the Salk vaccine hope polio would disappear
the polio virus crept right up and knocked me in the rear.
Dancing all around the gym feeling free just like a bird
I dropped to the ground just like a stone and no one said a word.
The pain it was so searing-the diagnosis even worse
"It's polio" the doctor said...he was abrupt and terse.
Called one of the 'lucky ones' I had a 'mild case'
but with the other athletes I could never keep their pace.
Miss Holly physical therapist, curly hair and a warm, broad smile
it tempered the pain of being apart - to walk I'd take awhile.
I always wore those 'special' shoes the kids they poked and teased
with no support and much abuse with childhood I wasn’t pleased.
But put nose to the grindstone and learned all that I could
I couldn't kick a ball but my grades were always good.
Years went by and no more thought to polio did I give
I accepted the limp, everything else and decided my life I would live.
But symptoms of weakness and muscle pain did grow
I kept a stoic face hoping no one else would know.
Life no longer was my own I struggled through each day
suffered in silence, alone and afraid tried to keep depression at bay.
And with the grace of glorious God my world it opened wide
I discovered there was a Post Polio team and they were on my side.
Sought out paths for healing and my spirit flew free
for the first time in life, I could truly be me.
The chains are gone and possibilities abound
I'm a tree with my roots planted firmly in ground.
Using wheelchair to travel, set limits on what I could do
resulted in joy to realize I could live life anew.
Celebrated my body-creaks, groans and need for a brace
while in my mind I focused on winning a 10K race. Poet
I'm now off the sidelines, no need to sit and whine
so much gratitude fills my heart and love and beauty shine.
After all these years I can join the loving human race
I exceed all expectations and now I set the pace.
After writing that poem, I realized I was at a crossroads in my life. I opened my heart to gratitude and forgiveness to heal the childhood trauma and visualized a future very different than the one the doctors predicted for me. Poems flowed out of my heart and soul as though a spigot had been turned on. When I went to the Newburyport Literary Festival in April of 2007 after deciding to pursue my newfound passion as a writer and poet, I shared my story with anyone and everyone who would listen about my journey. The critically acclaimed writer Peter Guralnick took time to give me tips about getting my material published. The literary critic who interviewed Peter at one of the workshops said to me, "You're channeling poetry aren't you? How cool!"
It's been an incredibly cool 15 year journey since that first poem flowed out of me. My little business, 'New World Greeting Cards - Original Poetry for Every Occasion' didn't quite take off as I had initially thought it would. I continue to create original poems for milestone birthdays, anniversaries or other celebrations for family and friends. The Universe had plans for me other than becoming a successful business woman. I've become a motivational speaker and share a powerful message of healing, hope and possibilities reminding people, especially women, that they are not their diagnosis. My poetry has touched so many hearts, especially those poems from "Hope is a Garden: Poems and Essays From the 2020 Pandemic."
The poetry from Hope is a Garden is now available as an audio book with all proceeds being donated to Voices of Hope Boston who forward the proceeds to the Henri and Belinda Termeer Cancer Center for Targeted Therapies at Mass. General Hospital. Read Out for a Cure is now available for download with a $10 payment to me via Paypal at maryamcmanus@gmail.com or Venmo @Mary-McManus-21.
After writing "Running the Race", I discovered the healing power of writing poetry along with the feeling of unbridled joy and exhilaration that accompanies the creative process. After running the 2009 Boston Marathon, and experiencing adventures as a runnergirl, I wrote my Trilogy of Transformation. In March of 2020 when I realized that I was living through another pandemic, I turned once again to my pen, what I call my Divining Rod for healing and the flow of poetry continues as I edit, "Into the Light: Emerging from the 2020 Pandemic."
I'll share with you a 'sneak peek' to celebrate National Poetry Month:
Can You Feel It?
Stepping outside my door
I feel it
anticipation of Spring
transported without plane, train or boat
breathing deeply
an elixir from earth ready to give birth
heart flutters with hope.
Infinite possibilities
emerge from winter's womb
ultimate faith seeing the unseen
confidence of beauty unfolding
doubt yields to faith
barren trees poised to pop
sun's warmth enticing transformation.
Eager to shed
letting go
Spring's renewal
enters soul
eternally grateful
it happens every year.
From my heart to yours,
In health and wellness,
Mary
Be sure to visit my website at https://marymcmanus.com to learn about my journey to health and wellness in the wake of paralytic polio and trauma
Visit the News and Events tab to listen to my inspiring and uplifting interviews
My books to motivate, uplift and inspire you are available on Amazon
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